I know this sounds more like some ludicrous email spam than anything that actually works, but bear with me: this is some serious f*cking rocket science right here. Danny Choo posted today about "Rock Melon", a cell phone ringtone that, if listened to 20 times a day, is suppose to increase a woman's breast size (by up to 2cm). And what happens if a man listens to it, then? I wonder...

According to the good doctor, the ringtone works because it contains the subliminal sounds of a baby crying, which I guess is supposed to affect women in some primal way that makes their knockers immediately swell with dairy. I think it's also of note that Dr. Tomabechi is also a part time rock musician "on the side". Hit the jump to check out a full video, including an actual test on a woman that claims to have accomplished this goal. Here's another scary tidbit to chew on while you watch this: Tomabechi's next project is a ringtone that makes people fall in love at first sight. The perverse applications are endless...