Look, I need to tell you something. It's a bit of a secret. Japan is a dangerous place, yo. I'm serious. It's hard life on the streets there. They may dress it up in Lucky Star and Genshiken, but that's just because they want to lure you in there so that they can take your money. Moe girls? Yeah, they don't exist. The women are all like Balalaika over there.

What, you don't believe me? Well, here's a good example: A woman was minding her own business in an underground shopping arcade around 12:30pm one day, and a man approaches her and asks for directions to a hotel. She said that she didn't know where and then turned around to continue on with her life. But then the man, probably unsatisfied with the answer, stabbed the woman in her side and ran.

The woman survived, although she was rushed to the hospital and had to get stitches for the knife wound. Police haven't found the stabber yet, but this is what I mean: life ain't easy in Japan. Be sure to bring a vest with plate inserts when you go. You can always find one at the 100 yen shop if you forget.