The onion is the satirical love of my westerner mind. Today, a video about a pharmaceutical cure for perkiness crossed my desk. Yes, you heard me, perkiness. Too many of us suffer from having friends who are way to freaking happy... now there's hope. I know I, as a recent con-goer, would have paid for a beaker, vial, or crate of this stuff. Which I would then force feed down the throats of exuberant cosplayers bent on squealing and glomping. 

Also, since we currently lack the C-blogs to tell you so, I'm in Maui right now, on a laptop inches away from the beach. Die of jealousy.