10. Shinji Ikari/Naota/Simon the Digger

These are the famous whiners. An interesting bit of info I've read is that (supposedly) Naota and Simon are Gainax saying "What if Shinji were raised in different circumstances?" Interesting to think about, for sure. This trio kicks off the list because, for as much whining and self-doubt we had to deal with watching these shows, the characters manage to take a stand and go batshit insane (Shinji) or break the laws of reality with their manliness (Simon).

9. Kietaro Urashima (Love Hina)

Guh. More than anything, Keitaro epitomizes the poor self-image that Japanese men have about themselves, with his refusal to speak up and just clear any misunderstandings that people impose on him. Instead, he takes the verbal and physical abuse, probably because he's a masochist at heart. I can't even begin to think about the number of characters that followed him.

8. Tamaki Suou (Ouran High School Host Club)

Sure, the man exudes confidence and a princely manner, but it's nothing more than a bluff. The flourishes, the fawning, the bold statements: it's all to try and hide the fact that he can't even man up and ask the girl he loves out on a date.

Look, she really doesn't care about your mansion or your boat or your lions. She's a very down-to-earth girl who believes in frugality and practicality. So learn to appeal to those senses and make her yours already. Otherwise, I'll be rooting for Mori to take her. He'd be able to do it without even saying a word.

7. Kyon (The Melancholy of Suzumiya Haruhi)

Didn't expect to see him on the list, did you? Well, when you think about it, for all the talking that Kyon does, he's not really one for action. He'll listen to whatever Haruhi says, and as much as he might protest, he never actually says anything. Sure, he's got the hots for Mikuru and Yuki, but does he do anything about it? No.

He even went over to Yuki's place. Where it was just the two of them. C'mon, Kyon, learn to man up. Or are you just waiting for the right time to get intimate with Koizumi?

6. Shinzo Abe/Yasuo Fukuda/Taro Aso

Japan, you're the #2 economy in the world, and after That Great Man (Junichiro Koizumi) stepped down, he was followed by these men? They lasted a whopping year in their roles as Prime Minister, leading Japan to nowheresville. You have been the most uninspiring and ineffective leaders when it comes to Japan in my recent memory.

Yukio Hatoyama, of all people, is doing more than all three of you combined. Really, what happened to that warrior spirit? I guess it's clear that this list of spineless protagonists has had an effect on your psyche. Learn to man up and govern properly before stepping back into the Diet.

5. Kouta (Ane Doki)

Imagine being in this 13-year-old's predicament: you have a mysterious girl who's several years older than you with an awesome body deciding to come live with you, all the while teasing with sexual innuendos, and at the same time dealing with the petite class idol who's fallen for him. Horrible life, right?

Here's my solution: pick a girl and stick it in her already. They both want you -- it's plainly obvious -- but the class idol is the one that won't break your heart. So just make a choice already, and pick her.

4. Harunobu Madarame (Genshiken)

We get it. You're a sniveling otaku. But when you're confronted with a girl who actually doesn't mind talking with you and who you begin to have feelings for -- especially when she complains about how her relationship isn't working out all that well -- don't go and screw everything up by trying to distance yourself from her.

Really, this is your chance not only to man up and get yourself into a relationship, making both of you dramatically happier (well, at least you), but also to make a change in yourself so that you're not the creepy otaku that everyone hates. You could actually become a normal member of society.

3. Kamille Bidan (Zeta Gundam)

"Kamille is a man's name, and I'm a man!" Unable to take a little bit of teasing, Kamille finds himself punching military officers, and then proceeding to steal a Gundam in order to get revenge. For some name calling. Kamille epitomizes the socially mal-adjusted teenager. It seems that no matter what happens, all he can do is bitch and act like a spoiled brat. Commander Bright, I really need you to teach this kid that the entire universe doesn't revolve around him.

2. Ren Mihashi (Big Windup)

Back when I reviewed Big Windup, listening to Ren Mihashi bitch about every little problem and misinterpret everyone's actions as a sign that they hated him really got to me. Sure, I understand that his entire middle school career conditioned him like that, but even after your teammates show that they care about you? Stop babbling and throw the ball already. The series would've been half as long if you had just shut up and pitched.

1. Hideo Aiba (Sundome)

I love Sundome, I really do, but Hideo, the main character, is the biggest waste of life in the world of manga. This is a man who will masturbate with a rusty nail in his urethra just because a girl told him to.  He's a member of the "Roman Club," which is essentially a cabal of worthless rejects of the school "promising" to stay virgins through the end of high school. Like they really need a pact to accomplish that goal.

Hideo has no redeeming qualities, and can't work up the courage to just take what's sitting right there in front of him. Seriously, man the fuck up and stick it in Kurumi already. She's constantly pushing you around, humiliating you and for all you know, she might be sleeping around with other guys, all while denying you her goodies. So just man up already, stick it in her, and make her your proper girlfriend.