Pre-recap Note #1: Though you may see other recaps on Japanator, keep in mind that not all recaps are the same as the Super Helpful Anime Recap; others are less helpful.

Pre-recap Note #2: I apologize for the quality of these screenshots, my computer did something weird and they all came out a tiny bit warped- well okay, they came out so warped that they don't really look like screenshots anymore. Hell, they practically look like I drew them or something. I promise I'll do better next time!

Okay, probably the most exciting thing that's happened on the anime show recently was the long-awaited showdown between Sasuke and Itachi, which was shown on Naruto and Yumeiro Patissiere. The better of these two ridiculously overpowered killing machines was intended to be determined in the form of a pudding showdown.

I don't know why they made pudding, they usually make really nice cakes on YP, but I guess they had to dumb it down a bit for the visiting ninja; they hadn't developed their cake jutsu yet. We may have to wait a few seasons before they get up to that. I'll bet Sasuke would have learned all the relevant cake and pie jutsu if he'd stayed in school in Konoha, instead of running off like a dumb cat. Stupid drop-outs.

Ichigo and Vanilla look on while the ninja take over their ovens. I loved their interesting commentary on the match!

Anyway, the plot thickens when Itachi reveals the dark secret of Uchiha baking: If you take the pudding out of your brother's oven and put it in your oven instead, the pudding will be twice as delicious. Pretty hardcore, huh? I know my heart was pounding whenever Itachi slyly put on his oven mitts. Also, Itachi made Sasuke think at one point that he had stolen his pudding, but actually it was a trick and Sasuke had his pudding all along. I see why people have been waiting ten long years for this match-up.

I'm sorry this is still in Japanese- no one's fansubbed these episodes yet. I think Vanilla is saying "Uh, what the fuck?" and Ichigo's just like "They suck at baking." That's my educated guess.

Naturally, because all ninja are so powerful that the earth and all other planets of comparable size tremble before them, no mere mortal could judge the pudding contest; just getting a whiff of high-level ninja pudding would send most people to an early grave. Only divine beings could possibly taste ninja pudding and live, thus the Angeloid Ikaros was summoned. They tried to get Belldandy first, then Urd, then Skuld, then Angelique, then Nanael from Queen's Blade, then all of those anime chicks that are probably angels because they have the wings and stuff, but they all had something to do that day. Or that's what they said, anyway.

I was particularly moved when a single tear flowed down Ikaros' cheek.

All Ikaros wanted to do was judge the contest as a human would; her only desire is to become more human to please her master. Apparently, he doesn't like his mindless, voluptuous love slaves to be too inhuman- and I don't want to be insulting here, but I think it's safe to say that makes him one picky little asshole. Anyway, since it would be impossible for a human to judge this contest (see above), Ikaros was at a total loss, and did nothing. I think it's safe to say she missed the point of the exercise. She does that.

So, unfortunately the pudding contest didn't produce a winner. However, then this happened:

This battle was NOT for the faint of heart. Ouch Chocolat, I know he borrowed your oven and all, but still....

Using the brutal, golden-fork-through-the-eye-socket jutsu, Chocolat dispatched Itachi handily, making Sasuke the winner by default. I would say "couldn't happen to a nicer person", but Sasuke was in the room. 

So basically, Sasuke won- although, now that he's been deprived of his whole purpose in life, maybe Itachi is the real winner here. I don't think Sasuke had any particularly good ideas for what to do during that troublesome "Post-Itachi-Killing" period. Maybe Kakashi can teach him to read or something, but I doubt it.

Stay tuned for more Super Helpful Anime Recaps, which will come out on the first of approximately whenever I feel like it. Hey, it takes a long time to do this, you know. Being this helpful doesn't happen on it's own.