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Yotsuba & Deliverance


Journal Entry 781:

My previous writings have been sparse and rough. As I, Ben, lay in my carpet-less and cold room, I wonder what my boss is doing right now.

(Brad Rice is a prepubescent girl with the voice of mountain man vexed by a cold, tuned down two octaves in an audio editor.)

He's probably playing a video game, but the more I think about it the less I'd rather find out. I think I'll stay in my room for now. But wait! A knock on my door. I slowly creep over to the drafty doorway and crack it open just enough to see who is outside.

"Have you finished your writeups yet?"

Journal Entry 782:

"Oh, hey Josh."

I had forgotten about the recaps. Crap. I had to stall for time.

"I uh... I gave them to Brad... or something..." I mumbled out. Maybe if I could get an extra hour I could write them. Josh was flustered, "Wait, why the hell would you give them to Brad?! I'll never see them again!"

"Well, you weren't around and Brad's the boss so I just–" Before I could finish Josh interjected, "Look, next time just leave them on my desk, okay?" "You don't have a desk." Not that anybody did in our run-down apartment were we all were imprisoned– er, living. Josh glared. "Just slide them under my door." I nodded in affirmation and shut the door. That was close.

What I found out later was that Josh actually went to Brad to find the recaps and lost roughly a pint of blood in the process. The only reason I know this is because the next morning there was a glass pint jar sitting on the kitchen table with a note attached that read: "NEXT TIME BRING A BETTER WEAPON."

Journal Entry 788:

Tim delivered a pile of new manga to read.

7 volumes of "Gossip Girl: For Your Eyes Only."

I wonder if he's trying to tell me something.

Journal Entry 790:

I'm on volume 2 of Gossip Girl and I'm already about to kill myself. How can teenage girls like this? Doesn't this violate the Geneva Convention? I'm pretty sure I read about someone getting a disease from this book in the paper. "Terrible book" disease.

Journal Entry 791:

Today I read volume 3 of Gossip Girl. God has forsaken me.

Journal Entry 792:

I was able to get my hands on a copy of the latest Yotsuba volume. Life is good again.

Brad began trying to get people to clean up around the apartment. Everything is falling apart, slowly but surely. Colette moved out and got her own place – how she was able to escape, I'm not sure, but she is still getting free toys, thus I must hate her.

As far as actual cleaning went, well, it didn't. What ended up happening is we all started playing the best new video game that came out. We all had been waiting years and years for it, it has been delayed several times, and one of the best developers in the industry was behind it. It will probably be best game this year, given its amazing voice acting, unique gameplay, and entertaining writing. Of course, I'm what game you've guessed I'm talking about is: Mortal Kombat!

Tim is harping on me to finish up Gossip Girl and write up a review. I'm not sure I can take this much longer. Back to Mortal Kombat for now.

Journal Entry 798:

I'm up to volume 6 of Gossip Girl now. In case I don't make it out of here alive, whoever finds this journal should deliver it to my family. If the person reading this is Brad, PUT THE JOURNAL DOWN NOW! My review is due before the week is out. I can only hope I can persevere and finish this.

Journal Entry 799:

I began reading volume 7 of Gossip Girl, but had to pause to write this journal entry. This one is even worse than the previous 6! I mean, is this really how these girls live? How could anyone relate to them? I feel like if I read any further my brain will simply explode from the stupidity of it a-


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Ben Huber
Ben HuberContributor   gamer profile

I'm the managing editor of Japanator by day, and a roving freelance graphic designer by night! /  more + disclosures



Filed under... #Japanator #Japanator Original #yotsubato



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